some mighty big cans

December 1, 2006

they make large cans of redbull now! yipee hooray!!!!

i bought one today for the very first time. i was quite excited. especially since it looks like an enlarged version of the original can. and everyone knows how much i love enlarged things.

but i somehow managed to have a very retarded moment with my well-endowed can this morning. i can only see it as some sort of synaptic glitch, sort of like how every once in a while a computer gets really slow and then all of a sudden everything catches up all at once.

here's the chain of events;

1. jeni's hand and head decides that it's time to drink some redbull.
2. taking action on this decision, jeni's hand picks up said can of redbull and brings it up to jeni's lips.
3. in response to this action, jeni's head tilts back to allow the tasty liquid to flow easily into her throat.
4. the hand, still striving to make good on the intent of administering a refreshing beverage, tilts the can, thus pouring the bubbly goodness forth.
5. all the while, the mouth and throat apparently vetoed the "let's have a drink" idea.
6. the mouth did not open.
7. the throat did not swallow.
8. redbull everywhere.

after this happened, i put the can down, sat back; sticky, wet, confused.

i raised an eyebrow at my redbull covered shirt and desk and asked myself out loud, "what just happened here?"

what i'm imagining took place inside my brain was that my neurons fired... and my receptors got distracted by some shiny object.

i felt very much like someone had dropped the ball, but i was the only one in the room. several hours later, there's still a lingering sense of disappointment.

okay, back to work now. just felt the need to share that with the world.